Late to the trend

 I will fully admit, when I used to think of deer in Lolita, my mind usually went to something like this:

So cute! So adorable! So something I would never be confident enough to use in public without feeling like I raided my 4 year old cousin's toy chest.

It was sad, but true. Deer were very cute and lovely, but somehow I had warped them in my mind into something that was almost strictly associated with sweet Lolita. Huge eyes, pink fur and often associated with other baby animals, they were so sugary they made both my teeth and heart ache at the same time. I loved them, but I already knew through my trials in sweet Lolita that they would just not be for me. And somehow, through all of this, I was missing out on just how versatile they had truly grown to be within the Lolita community.

But then all of that changed when one day I was browsing through My Lolita Dress and stumbled across this beauty.

It was like something had flipped a switch in my brain. Those soft, muted colors. That A-line, flattering cut. Such beautiful, elegant embroidery. It was all so...so...classic!

I know. I missed out on a lot.

But I think that's what happens sometimes when we get into our heads that trends are an inherently bad thing.  We read about the lack of originality and the boredom, and it can sometimes urge us to back off from exploring something we might truly love. After all, who wants to a bandwagon jumper?

But I ordered that dress. And I learned something.

I didn't care.

I didn't care if I was joining a trend that many had long since considered tired and drawn out. 

I didn't care if I was joining the masses with a dull, unimaginative coord that had been done a thousand times before.

I didn't care if my dress looked matronly or my accessories didn't perfectly match.

And most importantly?

I still don't care!

I'm not a very confident person, and as much as I loathe to admit it, I often put too much stock in what other people think of me. But allowing myself to love and adore deer and wade as deep into this trend as I want has taught me something I should have realized a long time ago. That is to say, I would never be able to cultivate and accept my own personal style as a reflection of who I am if I continued to shape that perception based off of what other people wanted. 

 I know this is something most people realize by their late teens. But for me, this is a huge revelation. I know it's still going to be a struggle. I'm still going to feel that pressure and that doubt. But I hope that every time I look into a sweet little doe eyed face, I'll be reminded that I am my own person, that trends might come and go and that's okay to get swept up in them, and that my only goal should be to wear and express myself however makes me happy.

lightinthebox.com

Innocent World

My Lolita Dress

Yay deer!

My first Innocent World

I'll admit it. I'm in love with LaceMarket. It's everything I'd always hoped for in a second hand Lolita sales website, and I probably spend WAY more time there than necessary. Of course, it has it's fault (its Favorites system leaves much to be desired), but overall I adore this website and have found many amazing deals through it.

Case in point, my first two beautiful Innocent World dresses! I'm still on this kick about finding new things outside my usual little comfort zone, and these two dresses were at such a good price (seriously, less than $200 for BOTH of them, including shipping!) how could I possibly pass them up?

I'm so in love! I was a bit worried since the measurements listed had my exact bust measurement as the max limit, but it was so pretty I simply couldn't ignore it. I'm so glad I didn't! I admit, for comfort sake I do wish the bust was just an inch or so bigger, but thankfully it doesn't look overly snug when I wear it, and it's not so uncomfortable that I can't wear it all day. I may use the waist ties to add a little bit more breathing room to the back someday, but for now I'm pleased with it.

I absolutely adore the length and shape of it, this dress actually reaches my knees without a petticoat, and because of its shape it can be worn without one too. I wore it to work the day after I got it, and I paired it with my new chocolate Angelic Pretty necklace and a pair of camel colored pumps that don't really work for a proper Lolita outfit, but were cute enough that I got plenty of compliments. It was the first time I wore a full outfit without a shred of black in it for a very long time!

This second dress is admittedly a bit of an odd style.I was a little apprehensive at first, but in the end it won me over. I'm really beginning to love more and more these "sack" dress styles, they're just so comfortable and cute! Thankfully the bustline on this dress isn't as low as it looks, and now that I have it I realize it would be very easy to adjust the buttons on the back so it sits a bit higher if I wish. The straps tend to slip off my shoulders fairly easily too, so I think shortening them a bit will also help with that problem, though if I go that route I will definitely need to wear some type of underskirt with it.

Again, even though this dress has some black in it, I'm really proud of this purchase since once again I feel like it pushed me a little bit out of my comfort zone while still sitting nicely in the classic look I'm going for. The cream makes it really easy for me to coordinate with my brown necklaces I recently purchased (I like this dress paired with my BTSSB bear necklace personally), and I think it could be paired easily with either a white or black underskirt, depending on what look I'm going for. Without a petticoat it sits just about a couple inches above my knee, so it works well just as a simple dress that I can also wear to work, which is always a plus!

Overall, I'm so excited with these dresses! I actually bought them both a few weeks ago, but I decided to wait until they both arrived since one took awhile to get here (for good reason, it came all the way from Australia!).  I adore them both and I think they're the perfect gateway in getting me to keep pushing myself out there.

Loving it!